"Daddy-versary"

This past Sunday was a day I will never forget. For the first time ever, and perhaps the only time in my life, my wedding anniversary and Father's Day fell on the same day! I will not remember it for the disappointing fact that it was the day I began my first day of my new 10 hour shift at my new job, but rather what happened despite that hindering reality for Becca and I.

It's amazing how God uses undesirable circumstances to show you love. 

How better could a Father show love to his kids than by presenting them with incredibly challenging circumstances, extending the grace and aid necessary for them to overcome it, but only to the extent that they really actually need? By allowing His children to learn from experience that they have what it takes, to understand what truly matters ...and what does not, He is truly being what a Father is supposed to be, and truly loving as only a Father can. 

And, how better for a Husband to reveal love for His bride than to sacrifice Himself for her sake, and to present her with the very best, and nothing short, regardless of any present circumstances at any given moment? By laying His life down for the benefit and gain of one He loves, with no benefit or gain for Himself, and to be consistent in this, He is being the perfect Beloved.

This is what God revealed to my heart for the first part of my "daddy-versary". Being at work all day was the very last thing I wanted to be doing on this very special day. It was so hard. But here's the grace that was extended to me: It was the slowest day I have had yet at work, allowing for plenty of time to focus on what God was imparting to my heart. I have never been in the receiving end of an anniversary OR a Father's Day, but in finding myself in both at once, I realized that it's nothing like a birthday or a graduation or any other type of celebration of recognition.

"Two are better than one, 

because they have a good return for their work.

If one falls down, his friend can help him up,

but pity the man who falls

and has no one to help him up."

-Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

As a husband, my anniversary was about honoring, blessing, and serving my wife. I knew that before, but the issue in my heart and mind became this:

"How can I honor, bless, and serve my wife, if I am stuck for the greater part of this whole day at WORK without HER!?!?" 

And in that very place, God revealed the answer... Lay my life down for her. Rise above the hardships presented. Take on the responsibility needed to provide and protect her. Show her selfless love in consistency... by working. Because giving, doing, and being my best, even in the job that God has provided me with to take care of my family's needs, is loving my wife. My heart is convinced that my incredible wife deserves the world on a golden platter; a life with no worries, cares, or hardships, and every one of her needs and wants met at every moment. I would have loved to have had a day with Becca, all to ourselves, free to do as we wished; free to show her in the best way I could that she is my whole world, and that she alone holds my heart captive.  But God gently presented to my heart in that very difficult position, that in fact I was NOT failing my beloved, because I was loving her like He loves us; I was fulfilling the role of Husband as He has designed it to be, and there is no better way to be a husband that His way.

"Though one may be overpowered,

two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not easily broken."

-Ecclesiastes 4:12

As a father, how this day was supposed to be for me was a little more difficult to anticipate. My closest idea or expectation was something like birthday without a party or cake; pleasant wishes for a happy day, and some congratulations for my new-found role in life. There surely was that for me, and I am so grateful to have received every word and wish, but I was just as moved to realize how much more there is to it as I was to receive all I did in regards to my first anniversary.

Much like my profound revelation of what the role of being a husband for my wife is, the role of being a father for my daughter has so much more to do with me laying down my life and giving my best in all things and in all circumstances, than it does with any potential gain or benefit to me.

To me, my baby girl deserves the world and more; to be given the best of everything for her whole life, and I want to be a major part of giving her all of that because of how I love her so. By laying down for her my time, my kisses and cuddles, my words of adoration... to ensure her future as best I may, I realized that being her father in this way was being exactly the father that I want to be: a Father as is defined by God. 

By no means do I claim to myself be as good a Husband as God, nor as good of a Father as He is. What I am saying is this:

...by His grace, I am learning what it is to align myself with the model of Husbandhood and Fatherhood that He has set for me. 

I am forever a work in progress in this world, and yet I have already been given all I need to fulfill the purposes God has set before me and called me to in any and every situation.

 

When I got home after work that day, I found my beloved doing the same as what God had shown me I had been doing: living in that alignment of the model set before her in the roles of Wife and Mother. While she had juggled a fussy baby and a hyperactive puppy for the last 10 hours, she had also cleaned the house, made dinner in the perfect timing so as to have it done exactly as I arrived home, and taken the time to dress up... all for me.

Wow. 

What a woman! Beyond that, she had managed to take the time to create a beautiful gift for me. I was beside myself for her...

And so the second reason that I will never forget last Sunday for the rest of my life: Becca.

Once again she had proved to me in love, that I am the best man in all the world to her, and that I am hers, and she is mine. Words won't do her justice, but I am forever grateful for her love and devotion, and every day she gives me more. She is my beloved, my best friend, my most precious treasure, and my honor is to live every moment vowed as husband to her, and as father to her children. 

Here's to you baby, I love you even if... no matter what.